Hello internet. Or whoever is reading this at the moment.
A lot has happened in my life since the last time I updated, which was nearly a year ago. I started this blog as a way to express things going on in my life seeing as the only way I did was through various tweets on twitter as well as a bit of photography. Since the start of my freshman year of college this past fall, I haven’t had the time or the inspiration for much photography, and tweets on the internet about my life complaints and the admiration of music artists/bands can only do so much for one person.
It is nearing the end of spring break in my second semester of my first year of college. Tomorrow is my last day here at home, and then I go back to my college life; which isn’t much to be honest. Of course, college ranks way higher than high school on the life scale – I’m not forced to be stuck in classrooms for seven hours of the day surrounded by people I absolutely don’t like – however, college life for me hasn’t been like some of my friends from high school. Yeah I’ve gone out to parties and have gotten drunk with the roommates and people I just met a few times, but I haven’t really found people I connect with like others have.
I can’t help but feel jealousy for the way my past high school friends easily make friends with others and seeing all their new friends on Instagram and SnapChat, yet here I am always in my sad lil dorm room. Initially I was placed in a triple with two roommates, and of course with my luck, the one I actually liked and became great friends with left to go home until the next fall semester, leaving me with my other roommate who I’m positive truly doesn’t like me due to her reluctance to even talk to me!!!! Rip. Anyway, being someone with anxiety and crippling self doubt, I’m not surprised I haven’t found a solid friend group in college yet, but I really hope I do soon. In high school I feel that I’ve definitely missed out on those coming-of-age opportunities you see in movies and read about in books, and I don’t want the same to happen in college.
Another thing that happened this year was that I turned 19 whole ass years old. It feels weird to type and even say out loud, and it’s kind of strange to know that this is my last year as a teenager. I’ve always wanted to be older as a kid, and now that I am it’s pretty different than I imagined it to be.
Hopefully I will keep up with posts now that I actually remembered about this fucking website. Not sure about what I’ll exactly post, but I’ve been caught up in my mind far too much lately and posting about shit on the internet suddenly seemed like an ideal way to cope.
See you next weekend (maybe).